Vol. 1 Issue 18
There were multiple teams that played several rounds a night
at any given bar in town. After trivia had become so popular, the bar association
became the official governing body for all official pub trivia matches in Twin
Falls. You can perhaps understand why when I received the envelope from the
Idaho Bar Association I was not surprised. It’s true that the Idaho Bar
Association has a set of Doric columns as their logo used to suggest legal
matters I guess, and yes, the lettering in their logo, Idaho Bar Association, is different than ours,
Idaho bar association, but I’d had a few
drinks by the time the mail arrived that day, and so I never noticed these
details; this was the day, the day I believe was the beginning of my re-doing
if you will.
Actually, no, this day a few months earlier was when it
started…I saw a sign on a streetlamp - Bar Exam – this Friday. I removed it
from the lamp and took it with me. I just so happened to be free that
particular day and so I decided to attend the event. I signed up on-line as was
required and paid the $100 registration fee. I assumed that there must be a
sizable grand prize for the winner if they were charging such a hefty entrance
fee.
I customarily would have only attended trivia events with my
teammates, the social aspect of the activity being a very important one, but none
of my teammates were available to attend this particular event due to its
unusual time. ‘No matter,’ I thought, ‘there will surely be singles. We can
form an ad hoc team right on the spot.’ You’d think for a $100 fee the organizers
would’ve taken care of everything, but you’ll soon see this was not the case.
The first thing that I thought was a bit strange was that it
took place at one PM. Most of these events take place at night. Also, it was unusual
that it was being held on the university campus and not in a pub, the usual
place for pub trivia, but what can I say, I’m a big fan so I decided to try out
my skills in this unusual setting. I’ll admit, I was a little nervous.
Upon arriving at the university I found my way inside, and
ahh, finally a familiar site, the bouncer. This curbed my anxieties for a
moment.
When he asked me where I was going I showed him the advertisement
from the lamppost: “I’m on my way to the Bar Exam.” He looked in his book and gave
me directions to the Multi-Purpose Room. ‘A terrible name for a trivia room,’ I
thought, and still think.
When I arrived at the Multi-Purpose Room I noticed right
away that everything was off. The fluorescent lighting was not setting the proper
mood. The room was an awful square-shape with no windows and it smelled
strange. The long tables with chairs on only one side were spread too far apart
from each other, a very ineffective setup for communicating with my fellow team
members, not to mention socializing with other groups. I thought I’d at least
order a drink. I looked around for the waitress but I couldn’t find her, nor
could I even see the location of the bar. I guessed it must be in the back
somewhere. I was starting to get nervous again.
This being a non-bar association event, this group was
unfamiliar to me. I looked around for any fellow Twin Fallsians I might know,
but alas, I knew no one. My tablemate was rather a young guy wearing a suit and
tie. I thought, ‘What an exceptional young man, wearing such formal attire to a
pub trivia event. This is exactly the type of young person our organization is
looking to attract.’ When I leaned over to introduce myself and ask him if he was
new, and on what trivia team he was on in town, he apprehensively shook my hand
and asked, “What do you mean?” I repeated the question but he had already gone
back to his notes; I was shocked- he seemed to be ignoring me. ‘Not a very
social fellow’ I though, but I’d never blame a person for taking his or her
practice too seriously. ‘Study away my boy, but you don’t stand a chance here,’
and so I left him alone for the moment.
There were about twenty other people in the room, all of
them dressed quite formally, all of them were buried in their notes. No one was
socializing and I still did not see the waitress. I didn’t see any semblance of
teams, and I was having trouble meeting the other contestants, so I thought, ‘I
guess this is going to be a solo round? No problem. I’m open to the challenge.’
Soon a man came to the front of the room. To each individual
he passed out a large stack of writing paper, three sheets of exam questions, gave
a few brief instructions and went back to his seat. At his point I figured
there must be some mistake and so I was about to leave, but as soon as I got up
the man said very sternly, “NO STANDING! You will be given a ten minute break
the at halfway mark.”
Confused and slightly frightened I sat back down. ‘Where the
heck am I?’ I thought. In my dazed state I picked up the exam questions and
looked them over. What a coincidence- they were all law based. Not only was I
my team’s law question expert, I am a Law and Order fanatic, having watched
every episode inside-and-out, so when I saw the pages of law related questions
in front of me I thought, ‘I paid my one hundred dollar fee, I’m already here,
I might as well give this a shot.’ Even though I wasn’t having any fun, and there
was no sign of a waitress or a bar anywhere, I stayed.
Since I had no idea that this was going to be a written
round of trivia. I’d brought nothing to write with. I’d never heard of such a style
and made a mental note to ask my teammates if any of them had ever it. I turned
to my friend in the suit and asked to borrow a writing utensil when the man at
the back roared “NO TALKING.” He ran over and told me if I caused one more
disruption that I would be dismissed.
I eventually acquired a pen and spent the next five hours
answering law questions. When I finished, I was flabbergasted to hear that I
would not get my results right then, but in six to eight weeks! After all that
I had been through, I didn’t even get to know if I’d won. I decided then and
there I would never attend this type of trivia event again. Fast forward eight
weeks and you would find me faced with the package from the Idaho Bar Association,
and the surprise I felt when I opened it.
So I’ve put the pieces together the best I could. In
retrospect I can see maybe how all this happened. What I should have done.
Hindsight is always 20/20. Yeah, sure, now I have a bustling law practice,
maybe even one of best in Twin Falls, but I no longer have time for pub trivia,
or drinking six and seven nights a week.
I never should have left the university Bar Exam that day
until I’d found out, because when I groggily opened that thick envelop a eight
full weeks later and read “Congratulations, you have passed the Idaho State
Bar Exam. You are now qualified to practice law in the State of Idaho,”
I was still left wondering the most important question of all, it’s killing me
to know, who the heck won?
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